Body Confidence, Loving Imperfections.

Hello wonderful people! I’m in an absolutely amazing mood right now. Wanna know why? I put on a two piece bathing suit & felt beautiful. 

Growing up, I wasn’t too confident about my body. I was an early bloomer, so  my body started filling out before I even hit high school. To top it off, I was tall for my age so getting hit on by older guys was a norm for me (sometimes it would actually be a bit scary & intimidating tbh). However, people ,including family, would comment negatively on the way I looked. ‘Oh, you’re so big’, ‘oh my, you have stretch marks’, ‘you need to lose weight’ were some of the remarks I would get from people. Although I was flooded with countless positives about me being pretty or that I was very intelligent, to me, the negative completely outweighed them. To make matters worse, I was involved with a guy at one point who didn’t treat me very well & would say some of the most horrible things to me. 

Looking at me, you probably couldn’t tell that I was struggling within myself because I hid it so well. I always tried to keep a smile on my face or I just wouldn’t really talk at all. During high school, especially earlier on, I barely said a word to people. I didn’t value my own self or who I was as a person so I didn’t try to open up or talk to people. I had my few friends that I trusted & that’s it. 

Those were the people who really helped me out & somehow convinced me to really look at myself & value who I was because I truly have something to offer to the world.  Then I became a YouTube junkie & really developed my love & admiration for the fashion & beauty industry. Putting together the perfect outfit & making it my own really boosted my confidence. Knowing that I loved what I saw when I looked in the mirror made me want to love everything I was as a person. This is one of the many reasons I’m working towards being a designer; I want to continuously recreate that confident, creative aurora. My confidence transformation didn’t happen overnight but I wouldn’t have had it any other way. I think that whole experience taught me to value others based on more than their outside appearances & look at them completely; it truly humbles you to be honest. 

I know I’ve been babbling a little but I just want to let anyone out there that may be struggling with this, you are beautiful & created amazingly & uniquely. Nothing that anyone says should affect the way you view yourself, you are who you are with all your quirks & imperfections. I love you, & you should love you as well. 

Oh yeah, here’s the big reveal I bet you’ve been waiting for.
   
  (The pool was closed sadly, so none of the photography left the bathroom lol) 
(I was out in Costa Rica in this)

I hope you found this enjoyable!

Peace, Love, & Positivity,

Chazmyane

Dealing with Disappointments.

For the past month, I’ve dealt with a sad, & abrupt breakup. Yes, I am now a single woman & to be honest it’s very bittersweet. It was very disappointing in the way it was all handled because I did not receive the proper closure I deserved. It was as if I suddenly didn’t matter to him any longer & he could care less about how I felt. So at first, I took it pretty hard. I’m not ashamed to say I cried at night & even during the day. I was in a very emotional & fragile state & to make matters worst I couldn’t figure out what exactly went wrong. I did have high hopes for our relationship because to me, he just seemed very different from the rest which lies in the amount of disappointment I felt. I see now that although he may have appeared to be different, his intentions as far as his relationship with me was the same as the others…to be temporary. However, I do not regret anything that happened. It all just made me an even stronger & resilient individual. I learned a lot from this situation & I know one day God will provide me with a man that will love & cherish the woman that I am & am becoming. Until that day comes, success, achieving my goals, bettering my mind, spirit, & body, & being happy will be at the forefront of my life. No time for others & that extra baggage! To any young ladies that may be reading my post, just remember you’ll never be good enough for the wrong person & pain is only temporary. You are strong & have the ability to do great things. Never fret in rough times, just give it to GOD (or your higher power), & keep pushin’. Things will get better, I promise. 
Peace, Love, & Positivity,

Chazmyane

Vogue.

Happy Sunday everyone! I hope you haven’t missed me too much on here. Today, a customer came into the department store where I work & gave me the greatest compliment on the planet! She said “You look like you stepped right out of Vogue.” I mean I absolutely loved this compliment & she said it more than once so I was definitely feeling myself afterwards to say the least. When I was younger I did dream of being a model one day but I never really thought it would happen because of my size. I mean I do not really think I would fit in the plus size category but I’m not a typical model size either; I’m like the ‘inbetween body’ per se. However, her compliment & previous comments from others has got me back to thinking about modeling & I decided to do an impromptu photo shoot using my IPhone. I haven’t edited or made any changes to the photos. Here are the outfit details….

1. Blazer- Forever 21
2. Black top- JC Penny
3. Skirt- Ross

      
I hope you guys enjoyed this post. I would love it if you left feedback & your thoughts 🙂 
Peace & Positivity,

Chazmyane

Take Control.

I have really been thinking a lot about my life lately & I’m truly not satisfied. Although I have some great people surrounding me & a wonderful boyfriend in my corner, I’m not truly my happiest because I’m not completely happy within myself. I’m still young & have a lot of life ahead of me & things to learn so I know that everything will come together in due time. I have decided to make a few changes though, as I believe these will be very beneficial for me. 

First, I am going on a natural hair journey. Technically, I have been “natural” since my sophomore year of high school but  I constantly wore weaves/braids & I didn’t take care of my hair properly. Therefore, I’m deciding to really give this a go & work on making my hair healthier. Additionally, I’m deciding to eat better & exercise more. I remember being more active & eating better foods while in high school. I even worked out at LA Fitness for awhile & that actually made me feel better at the time. Since I graduated, it seems as though working & going to school has taken over most of my time & I just seem more tired & worn out. However, I am going to make these changes because they will help me out more in long term anyhow. 

I know I can’t make any drastic changes overnight as that leads to failure but I’m hoping to gradually incorporate cooking my meals, working out, and taking time out for my hair into my daily routines. I’m truly looking forward to the things to come! 

Peace & Positivity, 

Chazmyane 

Costa Rica: My Experience

I began this post while on my trip & haven’t had time since I returned home to edit & modify until now. I hope you don’t mind the apparent tense changes within this post! Without out further delay, here is COSTA RICA:
Life seems so simple which makes the time go by a lot slower. I’m not saying that Costa Ricans do not have troubles or that life is always easygoing and breezy but here, technology and mass media isn’t such a major part of the everyday culture. City life now just feels so insignificant; many of our everyday problems just start to seem so minuscule. I’m truly enjoying this experience so far and it’s actually starting to seem like HOME. I really hope that one day I can return to gorgeous atmosphere.

Now that I have spilled my heart and emotions, on  to the good stuff…

THE WEEK’S HIGHLIGHTS

1. We experienced all of the beauty of nature and wildlife in the area. We went on various hikes & OMG the altitude of this mountainous area really had me gasping for air (I’m REALLY out of shape right now, I need to work on this fitness) but I did make it through a 4 hr hike so I feel very accomplished!
2. We went zip lining & horseback riding! I wish I could post my zip lining video on here BUT I do have horseback riding photos 🙂 
3. Playa Samara Beach was absolutely gorgeous! Just to experience that beautiful view was so breathtaking! & The resort was beautiful as well! I loved being able to watch the lizards as well.

 Here are few photos from week:

    

     I hope you guys have enjoyed this post. I’ll try to add more photos later! 
Peace & Positivity,

Chazmyane 

Bienvenidos a Costa Rica !

So today is my first day here in Costa Rica & it has been wondrous! It was my first time flying in an airplane & to top it off I was traveling to a completely different country and culture! I was beyond nervous but to my surprise it was better than expected although we were provided a not so appetizing snack while in flight (I take my food VERY seriously). Once we landed in San Jose & went through a little hassle with Customs, our adventure began! We stopped by a local touristy restaurant for lunch. OMG, THAT FOOD WAS DELICIOUS! It was so FRESH & you can really tell that A LOT of love was put into it. I especially loved the papaya, pineapple, & plantains! HMMM, I’m getting hungry just thinking about it. Afterwards, we made our journey to UGA (University of Georgia) Costa Rica in Monteverde. It was a very long & tiring 4 hr drive to Monteverde but it was well worth it because the scenery was beautiful & quite interesting. Everything has been perfect so far & I can’t wait for our adventures to come!  (Here are some of my favorite photos from the day… FYI, all photos are taken with my phone & unedited)

  

 Airplane Selfie

  Lunch was AMAZING! Hmm, platanos (plantains)!     

This is beyond beautiful 🙂

 My wonderful roommates, September & Xinia! 

I’m really looking forward to the rest of the week! It’s going to be the highlight of this year thus far! 

Peace & Positivity,

Chazmyane

Update.

I apologize to anyone who has started reading my blog for my lack of posts lately & the untidiness of my layout. I have been quite busy with school, work, & spending as much time with my boyfriend as possible. Plus, my laptop has now broken so I’m waiting to get that fixed so I can dabble more into making this a great blog. On another note, Spring Break is almost here & I’m beyond excited for it as I will be taking my FIRST trip out of the country to Costa Rica for an entire week! To say I’m feeling like a true boss right now is an under statement! I know I will take lots of pictures & I will do a post about my entire time there. For now, all I can do is dream of sunsets and refreshing waterfalls. I hope you guys are doing well & making SHIT happen!

Peace & Positivity,

Chazmyane 🙂

2015: A Year of New Beginnings & Growth

I know it’s already mid-February and all the new year hype is dying down but I still felt the need to start this blog off with a new year’s type post filled with goals and thoughts and ultimately, introduce myself. First and foremost, I’m Chazmyane, similar to Jasmine, Alexia and I am a 20 year old art major currently residing in the Metro Atlanta area. Although I am an art major, I actually plan to transfer my education to design school where I’ll major in fashion design. To be honest, I don’t completely have my plan all together but it’s slowly getting there. With 2014 now completely over and 2015 just beginning, I really felt the need to make some changes in my life and really work towards goals that I have established and make SHIT happen. I have a HUGE long detalied list of everything I would like to accomplish this year but for the sake of this post(and your attention span) I will give just a brief overview.

1. Invest more time into my goals.
(Sketch more, sew more, just everything us designers do on a daily)
2. Believe more in myself and my abilities.
(Yeah, we all deal with self-doubt sometimes, but I truly want to get over it and go HARD)
3. Be more daring.
(Style-wise mostly..)
4. Live unapologetically.
(Pretty much tell everyone to kiss my rear if they don’t like it)
5. Make the most of every moment.
6. PUT ON A FASHION SHOW!
(the main goal of the year.. and it WILL happen)
7. Be happy and make others happy.
(Just spread the joy so we can all be hippies and eat Nutella)

Yeah, so this is pretty much my plan for the entire year. I know I’ll have some setbacks or shortcomings on some as I’m a big procrastinator but I’m going to roll with it and keep going and working!

Peace & Positivity,
Chazmyane